Black Ice, Black Sky, Black Mood

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Oh, I SO wish I had off tonight.

We’re supposed to get a measurable amount of snow.   Why does that ALWAYS happen when I am working?

For this morning, the roads had patches of black ice…even worse was our parking lot and our driveway at home.  Really an accident waiting to happen.

And there are dark, gray skies to match.

And lastly, me.  I didn’t have the best night last night.

Turns out there was an issue with one of the patients I worked with last night who had a continuous bladder irrigation…it clotted up and the patient had to go back to surgery and the surgeon was upset that the unit didn’t do the bladder irrigation properly and that made the intensivist upset that the nurses working on his unit didn’t know when to call or if there was an issue.  And I guess he was upset at me because I was the nurse working with this patient overnight.  But I KNOW IN MY HEART OF HEARTS I did EVERYTHING I could for this patient.  I don’t believe he got clotted up on my time.  The bladder irrigation never ran dry for me and there were minimal clots when I left.  I don’t know what happened after I left, but I know how I left the patient.

It made me so upset that of course I cried.  I HATE crying at work.  I feel like such a loser, so stupid.  I guess I’m just overly sensitive like that.  So I did not have that patient last night.  Everyone told me it was best to step away from the situation.  I did, but I felt like I was being punished.

It’s going to be a long time before this passes in my mind.

One more reason to NOT like where I work.

Really…I need to become independently wealthy…SOON.  Or find a job that actually appreciates the people who work there.

Okay, enough ranting.

I’m going to eat my breakfast and hopefully a good day’s sleep will make this seem better.

I really am crossing my fingers that I’ll be cancelled though!

Published in: on December 12, 2010 at 9:04 am  Comments (2)